Cheryl Groskopf, LMFT, LPCC
Holistic anxiety, trauma, and attachment therapist in Los Angeles.
Healing Anxious Attachment Through Somatic Therapy in Los Angeles /
The Power of Somatic Therapy in Los Angeles: Healing Anxious Attachment and Relationship Anxiety
If you struggle with anxious attachment, it can make everything in your relationships feel *much* bigger than it is. Always on high alert, your nervous system looks for any indication that things might go wrong or that you might be abandoned. Eventually, your body starts taking the toll from this ongoing hypervigilance. It drains you physically and psychologically.
Why? Because anxious attachment causes your nervous system to scan the environment all the time. Your body goes into fight-or-flight mode when there’s even the tiniest sign of detachment, like a delayed text or a distracted conversation. You’re constantly trying to make sure your relationship is safe. Even while you know it’s probably not that bad, your stomach starts to cramp your heart races, and you become anxious.
The Good News?
When you identify this pattern, you can start to calm your nervous system whenever those apprehensive thoughts come up. The key to managing anxiety is to learn to accept it and remind yourself that, despite what your mind may tell you, your body is safe.
somatic Therapy in LA: Nervous System Regulation
Understanding How Anxious Attachment Affects Your Nervous System
Let’s say you text your partner, and they don’t respond right away. You then start to feel physically ill. That’s your nervous system misinterpreting this as a real trauma. Even when nothing bad is going on, your body reacts as though something terrible is going to happen to you. Your brain immediately goes into overdrive:
“Did I do something wrong?”
“Are they mad at me?”
“Are they losing interest?”
Sound familiar? Even though you logically know that they’re probably just busy, your nervous system does NOT give AF. It’s already in full-on spiral mode.
Somatic Therapy Helps Your Body Remember That it's Safe
Attachment Activations: Why Does this Happen?
Your nervous system is taking over at that point, making you feel like you need to take action. This could be sending a follow-up text, second-guessing what you said, or going into panic mode. In actuality, your nervous system is dysregulated and is looking for validation that it is SAFE.
Pausing and bringing yourself back to the present moment is a great technique to acknowledge your body’s emotions.
Remind yourself, “My nervous system is on high alert, but I’m safe right now. I don’t need to fix this immediately.”
You may notice that by the time your body reacts, you feel less reactive and more grounded because you allowed yourself to transition out of fight-or-flight mode. Finding strategies to calm your nervous system before it gets overwhelmed is more important than trying to totally cease having anxious thoughts. That’s impossible.
Using Somatic Therapy to Manage Anxiety During Relationship Changes
When Plans Change, and Anxiety Takes Over
Let’s use a different scenario! For example, let’s say you have plans with your partner after work, but they text you to cancel at the last minute. Super frustrating, right? Your anxious attachment trigger is activated right away.
You begin to wonder, “Are they trying to avoid me? Are they against spending time with me? Could this be the start of the end?”
Your nervous system goes straight to the worst-case scenarios, which is why you have that familiar sinking feeling in your stomach, racing thoughts, and a tight chest.
Regardless of how valid their cancellation may have been, your attachment style is programmed to see any alteration as a danger to the stability of the relationship. You might find yourself overanalyzing things or have a strong desire to text back immediately see if everything is okay.
Healing both Mind & Body For True Healing
How to Soothe Yourself in Moments of Uncertainty
Believe it or not, the issue during times like this is less important than how your body is reacting to the perceived danger of rejection. Instead of rushing to judgment or asking for comfort right away, stop and assess the situation physically.
Do you have tense muscles? Is your heart pounding? You can become more grounded in the here and now by acknowledging these feelings.
Speaking directly to your worried “part” is one useful strategy. Saying something like, “Hey, I know you’re scared because the plans changed, but it doesn’t mean I’m going to be abandoned,” could actually be super helpful. Although it may seem silly at first, accepting that this is simply a part of you, and not all of you, can help you become less anxious.
How Somatic Therapy in Los Angeles Can Help Rewire Your Response
Relationship Uncertainty: A Major Trigger
Let’s do another example. Let’s say your girlfriend casually says, “I might have to travel more for work next month,” while the two of you are hanging out, enjoying a wonderful day and feeling safe. It seems insignificant at first, then all of a sudden you get that old pit in your gut. Anxious thoughts race through your mind:
“What if they’re gone for too long?”
“Will I just fade into the background?”
“What if our paths are going in different directions?”
Your heart begins to race, and this overwhelming worry takes over the remainder of your day.
Why This Happens
When you hear something like your partner’s travel plans have changed, your amygdala—the part of your brain that processes emotions and triggers your fight-or-flight response—interprets it as a possible danger. Your body reacts as if it’s a life-or-death situation, even when logically, you know it’s not. This is where somatic therapy in Los Angeles comes into play. Somatic therapy focuses on helping your body and nervous system reprogram these old, reactive patterns.
Trauma-Focused Therapy
Grounding Techniques to Soothe Your Nervous System
One of my absolute favorite techniques in somatic therapy is using your senses to ground yourself in the present moment. When your nervous system is activated, using the 5-4-3-2-1 technique can actually bring the reasoning part of your brain (aka the prefrontal cortex) back online. Here’s how you can do it:
- Name 5 things you can see.
- Name 4 things you can touch.
- Name 3 things you can hear.
- Name 2 things you can smell.
- Name 1 thing you can taste.
This practice pulls you out of stage 10/10 spiral mode and brings you back into your body. You use your senses to remind your nervous system that you’re safe. This is something that I love doing in my somatic therapy sessions: helping clients rewire their stress responses in real-time.
Somatic Therapy Los Angeles
Activating Your Vagus Nerve with Somatic Therapy in Los Angeles
Learning to activate the vagus nerve to relax your nervous system is one of the main principles of somatic therapy in Los Angeles. This helps signal to your body that it is safe and bringing it out of its panic state. Deep diaphragmatic breathing is a useful method that helps stimulate the vagus nerve. Here’s how to go about it:
- Breathe in through your nose for a count of 4, letting your belly expand.
- Hold for 4 seconds.
- Breathe out through your mouth for 6 seconds, fully emptying your lungs.
- Repeat this for a few minutes.
somatic healing in la
Retraining Your Nervous System with Somatic Therapy in Los Angeles
Before you jump right into action mode, take a second. You can tell yourself, “This is just my brain protecting me, but I’m not actually in danger.” Somatic therapy gradually retrains your nervous system to not immediately go into overdrive when presented with uncertainty by teaching you to react to these situations with calm instead of anxiety.
Body-based therapy can help rewire these attachment-based responses so that your body and mind feel more comfortable and secure, even in the face of uncertainty. It just takes practice.
If you’re ready to explore somatic therapy in Los Angeles, reach out today!
A holistic Therapy Approach in Los Angeles
Discover How Somatic Therapy in Los Angeles Can Help Heal Anxious Attachment
Holistic healing that includes the body is a powerful approach for managing anxious attachment that goes beyond simply controlling your thoughts – it supports inner healing. You can begin creating connections that are healthier and more secure by paying attention to your body’s reactions and training your nervous system to feel protected.
Somatic therapy in Los Angeles gives you the tools to manage your nervous system, reduce anxiety, and take back control of your emotional responses through methods like breathwork, grounding exercises, and nervous system regulation. While working with a holistic therapist who focuses on the mind/body connection, those nervous thoughts will start to lose their power. You’ll gain more self-assurance in your ability to handle uncertainty in your relationships.
Ready to start healing? Reach out & learn about how somatic therapy in Los Angeles can help you feel more grounded, secure, and more at peace in your relationships.
Body-Based Techniques
The Long-Term Benefits of Somatic Therapy for Anxious Attachment
Want to know the best part? The more you practice somatic techniques, the more you teach your nervous system to not to react so intensely to perceived threats. You will become more grounded and in charge of your life as you develop an inner sense of security that doesn’t depend on outside validation. Eventually, the impact of those anxious attachment patterns will decrease and become more securely attached.
Because it addresses the underlying problem—your body’s reaction to perceived dangers in relationships—somatic therapy in LA is one of the best ways to get long-lasting transformation. You can finally feel more at ease, secure, and at peace in your relationships once your nervous system is 1) regulated and 2) your anxious attachment releases its grip on you.
Your Guide to Body-Based Healing
Meet Cheryl Groskopf, LMFT, LPCC
Hey there! I’m Cheryl Groskopf, a licensed therapist here in Los Angeles. I specialize in somatic therapy, attachment, CPTSD, and Internal Family Systems (IFS). I help people-pleasers, perfectionists, and individuals with insecure or anxious attachment feel more secure in their relationships by working with the body’s natural responses.
Therapy with me isn’t just about talking (that’s pointless)—it’s about understanding how your nervous system plays a BIG role in how you experience relationships – and how you interpret (and sometimes misinterpret) emotions.
My Goal: Helping You Heal
My goal is to help you connect the dots between what’s happening in your mind and your body so you can start feeling more grounded – and less reactive. Together, we will work to heal patterns that are no longer servering you. I use both somatic and IFS techniques to bring you more peace, security, and confidence in your relationships. Your nervous system deserves to feel regulated – and we will help your nervous system recognize that you’re safe, even when things feel uncertain. Ready to dive in? Contact me today!
